It's been a long time since I've posted. Life has been crazy. It's amazing what a difference a few months can make.
I had my Advanced 1 exam on Tuesday June 4, and I think it went well. I am waiting for a phone call or email to find out my mark. This summer I am working on my written part of my Associate Teacher's exam and hopefully taking my practical part of the exam next year.
Brian finished school and did quite well in all of his classes. He is taking 3 correspondence courses over the summer so his last year of university will be a bit less stressful and much more enjoyable. He is also working for a small crew framing houses.
On Thursday, June 13 Brian got a phone call from his brother-in-law. His parents were in a head-on collision and they both passed away. Brian's sister (who is 29 and has her learners license) was driving with their parents from Magrath into Lethbridge. Brian's sister is luckily ok, she got a really bad concussion and has had a bit of short-term memory loss and will likely never remember the accident. The people in the other car were injured but they are going to be ok. We were (and still are) in shock. It was so devastating to lose them like that. We knew that we wouldn't have them forever but we thought we would have many more years left with them. It has been a whirlwind, we are still so shocked and sometimes even in denial. I never know what to say when people ask me how I am.... I'm not ok, fine or good. But what else is there to say? Sometimes I say we're hanging in there.
I've known Brian's parents for almost 6 years and in that time they have become parents to me as well. I can't even imagine how Brian must feel because I wasn't raised by them and haven't known them my whole life and I am really upset and devastated. I am so glad that they were around for our wedding, I know it meant a lot to both of them to see their youngest child get married. I am just so sad that our children will never know their amazing grandparents. When we visited my sisters and my mom earlier this week, they said that they almost didn't recognize me and that I looked so much older than the last time they saw me. My response was that I felt like I'd aged a lot in the last week.
Most of the last few days I've been trying to act ok, because I am sick of feeling sad and I am sick of crying. I don't know if it's the best coping mechanism but it's helping me feel so much better. I am trying to support Brian and do whatever I can to make this a little less horrible for him. We have been staying at his parents house since we drove down the day after it happened. After I heard I called Janet (the director of my program) and told her what happened and that I didn't know what to do because I had to leave town. I told her about when I teach on Fridays and Saturdays, about my classes in the Novice Show on the Sunday, and my students who had exams the Monday and Wednesday. She was amazing and told me that I should send her an email with all the info, and she and the school would find a sub and find people to cover my classes, rehearsals and warm-ups. I have had nothing at all to worry about and I have been so grateful and impressed with how supportive and understanding the school has been. They also emailed the parents of my students to explain what happened so they know why I would not be there for some very important days.
I feel like my thoughts have been very disorganized but that is kind of how my mind has been the last 10 days. I just felt like I needed to get it out and write about some of this experience.
